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Title: The Farting Pills Reviewer: Yusuke89 Signed

"WEll Rakka didn't just lay still, she squirmed and struggled"

 

Yeah but according with your description in the fic, Kana held Rakka pretty tightly that she can hardly squirm. She couldn't be able have struggle THAT much.  =p

I guess my main point is that that scene could have been alot more plausible if Rakka laid on top of Kana in a pseudo-69 position then have her head caught in that position. Then she would be REALLY looking at her anus! =)

 Your story is still awesome though.

Date: May 04, 2008 12:21 am [Report This]
Title: The Farting Pills Reviewer: Yusuke89 Signed
Hold on, I just spotted another inconsistencey.....if Rakka's head was further down between Kana's legs then how on earth could she see her anus? Wouldn't she been looking at the mattress in that position with the top of her head brushing Kana's labia?

Author's Response: WEll Rakka didn't just lay still, she squirmed and struggled
Date: May 03, 2008 10:36 pm [Report This]
Title: The Farting Pills Reviewer: Yusuke89 Signed

I see,I thnk it would have been better if you had her face down. Her fart would have been more wide spreaded if her ass was facing up and not muffled by the mattress  under her ass.

 It's still kinda hard to imagine Rakka seeing Kana's anus though with that face up position of Kana.  Kana's ass was touching the mattress and I still can't imagine Rakka seeing it.



Author's Response: just becouse a persons butt is on a matress doesn't mean you can't see their anus though
Date: May 03, 2008 07:10 pm [Report This]
Title: The Farting Pills Reviewer: Yusuke89 Signed

First of all I very much enjoy the story. I have a fart fetish and I got totally hot reading this! I do enjoy your other fics here! You're actually my favorite author. 

My only complaint is that it was a bit confusing about the different body positions in this fic and it was sorta hard to imagine. Did Rakka tied Kana to the bed face down or face up ? Also how exactly did Kana grabbed onto Rakka with her legs so that she is looking right at Kana's asshole? If you could describe to me in depth the different positions in this particularly chapter then it'll be much appreciated so I can get a clearer picture. If you could respond to this post or PM me then it'll be great. I would love to hear from you ASAP.



Author's Response:

Thx, I'm glad you enjoyed reading it ^_^ 

Rakka tied Kana to the bed face UP.

Rakka wasn't looking 'right' at Kana's anus, she was just in a position to see it, since she moved her head further down inbetween Kana's legs

Date: May 03, 2008 10:21 am [Report This]
Title: Haibane Renmei: The Spring Reviewer: FallenStar Signed

Yes, this fic was very well done, barring the "they're/there/their" and "dicided/decided" and other errors such as that.

I particularly enjoyed the "Extra Scene" between Rakka and Reki. I thought that was the funniest sequence.

 

I also enjoyed the scene between Reki and Kana.  You know, I think I like Kana...  I wanna see more Kana pee desperation..  xD

 

 Two big thumbs-up!

 

 FallenStar

Date: Oct 04, 2007 02:26 am [Report This]
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