Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: OrpheumZero Signed
A belated re-revivew, but this is certainly much better now that it's been split up from the huge wall it originally was shown as.

Overall, it's quite a fun story, with a premise that isn't too unusual for the series. There are some iffy spots in the grammar, but nothing too jarring. Only other gripe would be that Hermione should have finished her dump before the end. The way it goes, it just sort of stops like "That's it.", it's just abrupt.
Date: Feb 22, 2016 11:42 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: sharqbait Signed
Awesome story. Excellet description of Hermoine filled with poop and of her expelling the poop.
Date: Aug 29, 2015 10:51 am [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: HaloAnime Signed
Finish this funny masterpiece of comedey!
Date: Dec 24, 2010 02:30 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Anime Lover Signed
wow, that was very entertaining ^_^
Date: Jul 07, 2009 11:18 am [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Anime Lover Signed

I'm with Orpheum, no one likes walls 'o text.

edit the format and I'll happily read it 

Date: Jul 06, 2009 10:03 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Zee_phyro Signed
Wow it's great! The details are unbelievable and I bet Harry would have his own 'private time' after seeing that. Too bad you didn't finish Hermione's pooping session.
Date: Jul 06, 2009 08:51 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: OrpheumZero Signed

Whoa, big block. I'm sorry, but it'd give me, and likely anyone else a headache to try and read this.

I'd advise going back and breaking it up into paragraphs. A general rule of thumb I know is to break every 4 periods, of course if the sentence or 'part' requires more, then it's fine.

Trust me, it'll be much easier for people to read and understand.

 

Date: Jul 06, 2009 08:03 pm [Report This]


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