This is the best fan-written story starring Samus I've ever read. You wrote the action sequences so well that it'd probably be entertaining to someone with no interest in women pooping, and her struggle with the hard bowel movement was handled excellently. You also do a good job of describing her desperation, with her bowels acting up a couple times before they move unstoppably. It gives the reader a nice bit of "will she make it or won't she?" I was actually kind of disappointed she wasn't humiliated, but I can also see the appeal of having her retain her dignity against all odds.
"With a yelp, Samus was sent flying back, landing hard on her pert bottom." That was my favorite sentence! It's a fun mental image for someone who spent so many hours of his teenage years playing "Metroid" games. I also liked the mention of her scrubbing her rear. Don't know why.
Lastly, I need to give you kudos for the dream at the beginning. Not only for its content, but for the fact that I thought it didn't realize it was a dream until she woke up from it. I was even making notes on how you could improve it before I learned it wasn't "reality."
I noticed several typos and related errors, some of which were confusing. It also probably wouldn't hurt to add some extra bits of scenery and other descriptions for each scene. Your story has a better "Metroid" atmosphere than any of the other fics I've read, but I still feel like you could have done better in that respect.
Author's Response: As I said, I was kinda stressing on choosing between a Zero Mission based story and an original 'incident' which lead to the somewhat aprupt and typo-ridden chapters. Most of the time I want to get a lot done, but I always seem to get a bit stuck or side-tracked, but in the end it still always surprises me at how much people love my works even when I think I didn't do my best. Guess I don't give myself less credit than I think I deserve.
But I'm certainly planning on returning and fine-tuning these chapters to make them even better.