Nyou Fiction Forums

I just posted a new story, featuring the lovely Nami of One Piece. If you haven't read it yet, read it! If you've read it already, review it!

Enjoy!

Alright, alright. Jesus, you're a bossy SOB :).

I read the story, good work.

Quote from: Poowrite on July 02, 2008, 07:55:32 PM
Alright, alright. Jesus, you're a bossy SOB :).

I read the story, good work.

Well,  you're like the official site reviewer, so why *shouldn't* you review everyone fics, eh?  :P

Well sometimes I don't get time to read everybody's stories. But it'd be nice to get a review for at least every story  ;D

I just added my entry for contest XI. Lady, the spunky devil hunter from Devil May Cry takes a much needed break after hunter demons.

Also, here's a quick look at what I've got in the works for the near future:

*Chapter 3 of my and Yarr's Sakura story.

*Another Case Closed adventure featuring Rachel.

*A Dragonball Z story featuring a 'lost episode' during Gohan's training with Videl.  8)

Quote*A Dragonball Z story featuring a 'lost episode' during Gohan's training with Videl. 

Sounds almost like the story I did with Gohan and Videl.  =P  But, you'd probably do poop instead of pee  xD

I have just posted the third part of my and Yarr's Sakura story.  :kawaii: Another glorious dump from our favorite sailor fuku wearing badass. Let us wish Yarr luck as he'll be handling part 4 in the near future.

I will have my army of a single one armed one fingered drunk monkey type it up as fast as possible.

Go monkeys go! Go monkeys go! Go monkeys go! Go monkeys go!

Let the toilets of Japan and the world quake in fear of Sakura's ass!  :shitbricks: (Jumps out of the way as avalanche of Sakura's shit piles onto streets)

I just applied some edits to my Devil May Cry story. Hopefully this will be in better taste now for those naysayer!  >:( (just kididng, I'm not mad..... *Rages at lack of proofreading-ness*)

To clarify my review, I think the scenery and atmosphere in the opening scene are great, but that those sort of details are largely missing from the rest.  I also don't think the toilet use itself was terribly well-described, but I can sympathize.  After writing enough stories where somebody uses the toilet it gets hard to write a dazzling new toilet scene each time.

Well what do you think of the improved version? I fixed the spelling errors and added some more description to the scenes/locations.

I'll read it once I finish critiquing the poem and novelette my friends wrote.

Sorry that took so long.  I didn't notice a lot of changes, but I did notice that you paint a clear picture of the diner.  I can really picture what's going on.  Did you update the pooping scene, too?

There are still a number awkwardly-worded sentences and little errors.  Probably the most annoying one is "You know, I may be a fun loving girl, but I'm that adventurous."  I assume that's meant to be "I'm *not* that adventurous."  You also say "blood gushing from the new worlds like fountains" instead of "new wounds."  Those are just the two worst examples.  You should really go through and proofread the whole story.

Still, you've got my vote.  ;D

Quote from: Jimmy Olsen on November 01, 2008, 11:40:54 PM
Sorry that took so long.  I didn't notice a lot of changes, but I did notice that you paint a clear picture of the diner.  I can really picture what's going on.  Did you update the pooping scene, too?

There are still a number awkwardly-worded sentences and little errors.  Probably the most annoying one is "You know, I may be a fun loving girl, but I'm that adventurous."  I assume that's meant to be "I'm *not* that adventurous."  You also say "blood gushing from the new worlds like fountains" instead of "new wounds."  Those are just the two worst examples.  You should really go through and proofread the whole story.

Still, you've got my vote.  ;D

*Twitches* DIE!!!! @_o *Charges at errors and stabs them with a butter knife* EVIL! *Sets fire to errors and then eats a potato chip* Ok, I'm better now..... :P


~Jimmy's possible reaction:  ???~

Anyway, I'll get on it and fix those mentioned mistakes, thanks for pointing them out. I hate it that I don't notice them until it's too late. One of these days I need to get a better writing program with the poofreader that fixes things for you and knows what you're trying to write (at least I think there's something like that :-[)

Ok, I did yet another quick retouch and fixed the most apparent spelling errors. I also touched up the pooping scene a little bit though not by much. Personally I thought I did pretty good on that part, given that I made that Lady wasn't the type to really sit back and enjoy it, instead opting to push it out as fast as possible. While it wasn't given the most 'spectacular' description, the way the character executes it can speak louder than just something they mumble/think as they go.

Have just finished my first Code Geass story. It's another super ultra mega power dump, so be prepared with a gas mask and CPR tools. These and other helpful items are located above your seats. Please enjoy the show....

@___@ <---- *Has lost it from the hours spent writing*

I decided that my Halloween story will the third 'Rachel's Crisis', which I'm sure everyone will enjoy since the second was pretty popular.

This time, Rachel might not be so lucky when it comes to 'taking care of business'.  ;)

You don't seem to be very good at handling reviews that are even partly critical.  To clarify, I wasn't saying that I didn't like Jimmy's perversion in the story.  I was saying that I thought it was funny, even though I'm usually averse to such things.

Quote from: Jimmy Olsen on November 24, 2008, 04:18:07 AM
You don't seem to be very good at handling reviews that are even partly critical.  To clarify, I wasn't saying that I didn't like Jimmy's perversion in the story.  I was saying that I thought it was funny, even though I'm usually averse to such things.

I think I handle criticism well. I wasn't mad or anything. I was just making it clear that Jimmy does tend to let his thoughts run when he thinks about Rachel. I just don't see why you'd be bothered by that sort of thing. Nothing wrong with being a little perverted, as long as you know where to draw the line between harmless perversion and creepy stalker weirdo. (And there is a big difference).

I don't want to start an argument here.  Let's just say that I try not to let my thoughts get too perverted, and that I'm most sympathetic to characters who are the same way.

Quote from: Jimmy Olsen on December 01, 2008, 04:47:04 PM
I don't want to start an argument here.  Let's just say that I try not to let my thoughts get too perverted, and that I'm most sympathetic to characters who are the same way.

Whatever, I wasn't trying to start anything either. Just pointing out that there's nothing wrong with being a little perverted as long as you know the time and place to act like a real person and not a dirty minded goofball.

*walks in completely from left field*

QuoteI like big dumps too, and sometimes the really over the top ones. Heck, I would mind seeing a story with an iconic anime girl delivering a load like you in the UWD pictures (so thick an Elephant would be a screaming murder :P) I might even try a story like that sometime, though I'll have to probably try a series that would fit with it's girls having such colossal logs.

Your words. Allow me to inspire;

a) Your upcoming One piece story.
b) Some new kind of devil fruit.
c) Heaps of food.
d) Nami and/or Robin's butts.
= logs that wont fit down a normal toilet.

*walks back out*

*Thunder rages over the heavens, a jagged canyon is covered in shadows, rain, and something else...*

Crack!

*Emerges from the deep canyon, super buffed body, like in Street Fighter or something*

I have returned! Now, to exact my revenge-er I mean post a new story. It's a quick little job, but should suffice until I can come up with a more well written one.

Can I have permission to use your character Reiko Namaki in a diaper fic?

Sure, be my guest. I would say have it that she uses them as an alternative when she's got stomach problems, but isn't willing to let that get between and some messy fun.

Thanks.  The story will probably be done and posted some time Tuesday.  It's actually developed in an unexpected direction, so I should probably change the main character's name to avoid inconsistencies, but I'll definitely include a note saying she was inspired by your Reiko.

Gonna be on a bit of an extended leave, my mother just died the other day. Probably might not take part in the new contest and certainly won't be in the mood for stories for a while. But I hope to see plenty of good new material by the time I'm back in shape.... Well, see ya guys around in a little while... :'(

Jesus Christ.

My deepest condolences. Take care of yourself and yours.

I'm sorry to hear that.  I hope you and your family makes it through this.

Geez... first my dad goes and breaks his hip, necessitating a move for me and now this...

This doesn't look to be a good year for the Nyou crowd...   :-X

I'm really sorry to hear that, Orpheum.

You have my deepest condolences and best wishes.

You also have my condolences and my thoughts will be with you and your family.

Sorry to hear that Orpheum. My deepest condolences and hope the best for you and your family.

Orpheum, I feel like I need to say something, but I can never find anything to say at these times except sorry.

I know it's silly, but never feel guilty, even a little bit, for ignoring us, do what you have to for yourself and you family.  I do hope to hear from you again sometime though, I feel like we're all friends here.  In some ways, I can be more open and honest with you guys than anyone I really know.  Anyway...  hope you can read this tread and see how much people really care.

    Deepest condolences, DrBones

What Dr. Bones said is true, you should take as much time as you need to sort everything out and get through this. We're a pretty tight knit group on these boards, and I'm sure that everyone here will understand.

I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through right now, but I want you to know that you have my support. I'm truly sorry for your loss.

Thanks guys, I appreciate all the support. Thankfully, my mom had taught me a long time ago to not let death be a world ender, even when if it does shake us to the core. It's feels a little darker in the world, but yet I have to face that darkness head on and not despair.

...I just hate thinking though that now my mom is probably gonna see what a pervert I am. :P Then again, she always believed that one shouldn't be ashamed of their sexuality or prefrences despite what Religion and 'normal' people say. Well, as long as it wasn't pedo shit or complete disrepect for other living beings.

Again, thanks for the kind words and support. I know tha deep down, my mother would be disappointed if I rejected my whole lifestyle just because of shame and regret that shouldn't be there at all. And of course it's not like it's my only hobby in life  :P.

Besides, I love writing these kinds of stories along with the more serious ones, and to give up on these would be insult to her and my own talent.

Does anybody here work as a mod or whatever for Danbooru? Seriously, where it fucking say you can't post scat? Honestly, they've got like 40 pics and yet every time I try to post a picture, it gets fucking downvoted for no good reason and now I'm getting bullshit that scat isn't allowed?! What the fuck is wrong with that place? They've got tons of peeing, plenty of guro and other weird stuff, and like I mentioned a good amount of scat. So why the fuck am I getting singled out all of a sudden? Seriously, I swear I'm gonna bomb one of those freaking sites these days if they don't learn to play fairly... >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(

Unfortunately Orpheum, at the end of the day it doesn't matter what the official rules say.  If the vast majority of people on a site don't like something for whatever reason, it's not going to last long.  I know it's not what you want to hear, but sometimes you just have to pick your battles.  If every scat pick you put up immediately gets downvoted, it seems that a lot of people there don't like it and never will and that's there loss.  Believe me, no one would like to see this stuff shared, discussed and collected more widely than me, but I don't think posting it where it's not accepted is the way.  If only more people understood the difference between our kind of "soft scat/EFRO" and the messy stuff I think it would be more accepted.  :'(

That being said, I'm more convinced than ever that the Internet is full of a-holes and professional haters who do nothing all day but try to destroy and bring down everything in the world.  There may be some heated discussions, but this is still the most most civilized place on the Internet that's not super-exclusive or ultra-heavily moderated.  I'm amazed Waru still tries to share things on Gurochan with the way those people treat him.  :(

The other thing I will never understand is why our interests are so much less accepted than other "alternative" hentie fetishes.  I know I say this all the time, but how can so many people get off on stuff like guro, futa, and monster rape and then be totally disgusted be a cute girl sitting on the potty?  ??? >:(

*repels down a rope upside down like spiderman*

So. I was brainstorming for stuff to do after finishing off the ongoing naruto and azumanga flicks and had settled on one piece. Then I discovered that 1) I wont have much time come July to work on stuff for a good while. 2) Orpheum is already planning a one piece story!

Now I don't know if you're past the planning as your sig says so I'll share my not at all obvious idea that I had considered to use for my flick, for the good of humanity.

*drumroll*

Nami/Robin eats a devil fruit.. that multiplies the bodily waste! It's so original! A tiny grape results in a arm-sized log and trench war quality gas. And maybe other effects!

Now thank me with souls for sharing the results of my excruciating creative process!

*hoists back up the rope solid snake style*

Quote from: yarr on June 10, 2009, 05:20:17 AM
*repels down a rope upside down like spiderman*

So. I was brainstorming for stuff to do after finishing off the ongoing naruto and azumanga flicks and had settled on one piece. Then I discovered that 1) I wont have much time come July to work on stuff for a good while. 2) Orpheum is already planning a one piece story!

Now I don't know if you're past the planning as your sig says so I'll share my not at all obvious idea that I had considered to use for my flick, for the good of humanity.

*drumroll*

Nami/Robin eats a devil fruit.. that multiplies the bodily waste! It's so original! A tiny grape results in a arm-sized log and trench war quality gas. And maybe other effects!

Now thank me with souls for sharing the results of my excruciating creative process!

*hoists back up the rope solid snake style*

Sorry, plum out of souls at the moment, might I interest you in some lovely coats? *Opens pants like Guybrush and removes a rack of coats*

Anyway, that's certainly a neat idea, though it wouldn't work for Robin given the fact that once a person has eaten a Devil Fruit, they can't eat another since it'll destroy them. Of course, Nami hasn't eaten one. It could work as a stand-alone, since I don't really think it could work out in a lengthy multi-part story. Of course, if it wasn't exactly a devil fruit, but something that caused Nami and Robin pooping/peeing issues, I might be able to get a lengthy plot outlined.

*Turns and walks into the shadows, a flickering light illuminates a now empty alley*

Or, Someone is so busy reading they forget to flush soon enough, causing trouble..

(http://img199.imageshack.us/img199/3463/nrstb1.png)

Quote from: yarr on June 15, 2009, 01:00:30 PM
Or, Someone is so busy reading they forget to flush soon enough, causing trouble..

Hehehe, looks like Ami might not be the only distracted bookworm. Now I'm getting an idea for a one-shot with ol' Robin. Hopefully you'll be able to see it. If not, then maybe when you come back from vision quest break. :P

Sorry to alter your post, Orpheum, but I think only one showing of any pic per topic is enough  :P  - FallenStar

So is your "Toilet Reapers" story an entry for the "What Happened During...?" theme that will almost certainly be the new contest tomorrow?  I assume it would qualify.

Not really, though I could call it a warm up at least. I'm sure you've read it, and would probably agree it's not quite up to quality like my other stuff. But I think I've got something much better planned for the contest.

It wouldn't be the worst entry in one of these Story Contests, but I agree it's below your usual standard.  Which isn't to say it's bad, it's just a simple scene rather than a bona fide story.  If you fleshed it out, or inserted it into a larger story, it could be a force to be reckoned with.

Just posted a new story, this one based on Rave Master! It's a lot like the "Toilet Reapers" in that it's kinda like "What Happened during?" But this isn't my official entry for Contest XV. Though these two recent pieces have helped me get a good grasp on what I should do for my actual entry.  ;D

Hello? Is anyone gonna review it? I mean, I can see it's already gotten nearly a hundred reads, but I want to see what people think! Come on, show your love for the stories, people! Don't make me beg! *Slowly reaches for Desert Eagle stuffed behind belt*

*Walk slowly from the crowd, acting like nothing happened*

"Damn.... I shouldn't left it behind! Now look who has it!!! Stupid, stupid!"

*Pulls Dragoon Laser out of nowhere and readies Max Burst*

I'll read and review it soon.  I'm rather busy right now.

Just posted my Metal Gear Solid story for contest XV(A). And this has TWO, count 'em, TWO! chapters to start with! Please read and review.  8)

I have a couple suggestions for if you revise your Sniper Wolf story.  It would be nice if you had some descriptions dealing with the volume of urine she's excreting (since she's been holding it for days).  It would take minutes of continuous flow to get it all out, and she'd be pumping several liters into her bodysuit, which would probably make it feel something like a water balloon. 

Also, it would be neat (at least in terms of the possible spinoffs and sequels it'd open up) if you mention that she can keep her bowels shut tight so well that sometimes when the mission is over an enema is necessary to make them release their cargo.

It's a story with a lot of unexplored potential.  ;D

The Sniper Wolf story was great. ;D I'd been looking forward to it for a couple of weeks and I wasn't disappointed.

You mentioned the possibility of including flashbacks to her training, and I think you should totally do that...sometimes I prefer it when past accidents are just referenced briefly, but I think in this case I'd like to know the details.

I'm also curious as to the kind of clean up that she normally does. Does she have a change of clothes handy or what? I can only imagine that she's quite experienced dealing with these kinds of situations...

Orpheum, this story has left me with more questions than I started off with. :o Tell me there's more coming :P

I'd also like to see her cleanup.  I forgot to mention that.

It looks like you've edited "Yuna's Close Call."  What else did you change?

Oh, that? I just unitalicized a passage, nothign major. It just bugs me when random parts show up in italics when I know I didn't specify it to.

yeah I think I'm going to see if I can add a check box in the edit chapter page, so it only marks the story as updated when checked.

That's a good idea. It would be annoying to see old stories getting bumped up just because someone is adjusting one or two words. An actual change *like my revised versions*, that's noteworthy for bumping up.

Just posted a new story, this time it features Samus from Metroid. I was kinda undecided between two versions of the story, so I posted both. They're not the greatest, but I think I did alright. :P

I recommend you play "Zero Mission," both for research and sheer enjoyability.  You can get it used for pretty cheap, and it only took me 7 hours to beat it the first time.

Maybe, there's a bunch of games I need to still get... and want.... * :kawaii:Can't wait for "The Last Guardian" :kawaii:*

I don't know what's going on, but the interactive path thing won't let me add new path. I keep trying to make one for Sailor Moon and it keeps saying: "Unknown error OR Path not yours to edit."  >:(

Here's the path, I'm getting tired of freaking rewriting it every time.

Usagi was happily stuffing her face when Luna appeared and told her of an attack taking place and that the other scouts needed her. With a groan, Usagi transformed and was on her way. However, shortly after taking off into the city, Usagi as hit by a crippling cramp.

"Oooh! I think I ate too much!"  She moaned, rubbing her tummy softly as it growled fiercly.  If that wasn't enough, Usagi could feel an ache in her bladder as well.

"That too?!"  Usagi quipped with riverfall tears in her eyes.  Then her bowels struck extra hard, and her other hand slapped over her butt as well.  Two blonde pigtails bounced from side to side as the girl wiggled her bottom frantically.

"Oooooooh, what do I do? I really have to go!"  She cried, both from the urge to relieve herself and the fact that her friends, Rei especially, would chew her out if she was late.

What was poor Usagi to do?

Anyone know if this site is still up?

http://piipii.pandora.nu/index2.html

For at least a year or so, every time I try to use it, it keeps saying you have to log in, which is impossible since you can't log into a site if there's no link for logging into the site to log in. Shame though, since this site was always good for finding pantypooping related pictures.

I believe you need a Japanese proxy server for that site still.

Oh, and where would I find one? I'm usually cautious about those random sort of apps since I know there are some ones that are traps for viruses.

I actually dont know nowadays  ???

Anyone remember that Half-Life 2 mod where Gordon hallucinates and there's a part whre Alyx is on the toilet?

Should be able to finish my entry very soon *hopefully today, after I sleep like a normal person, of course  :P* It got off to a rough start, but I think I'm getting my flow back. Heh, one of these days I really gotta get myself more focused and stop being so lazy  :P ;D

I should also mention I do have a good idea on how to start the next chapter of Sakura, thanks in no small part to a set of pics I found a while back. Let's just say Sakura's imagination tends to run wild even when she's sleeping!  ;)

I'm glad more Sakura is coming!  But you already know that.  ;D

So we're going to have a dream chapter?  Or just a dream sequence within a chapter set in "reality?"

You'll see.... You'll see.... All in due time.  ;D

Was playing GTA IV a while ago and came across something really interesing. While the series is known for having toilet humor among other things, I found a rather interesting message. One of the girl you can date in the game will text you a message of her sexy thighs with the words "Those enemas and squat thrusts have paid off to make these look good enough for you."

Hmm, didn't know chicks used enemas to get sexy waistlines.  :P

You wanted an explanation for why the girl in the picture was multitasking, and here's what I had in mind:

The characters are college roommates (who are lucky enough to have a bathroom in their room).  One is a Japanese girl who I'll call Kiki for the sake of this synopsis, the other is a bitchy American who I'll call Sarah.  It's Finals Week and Kiki is overworked and overstressed.  She's even been taking anti-diarrhea pills to prevent the stress-induced diarrhea she always gets on Finals Weeks.  She's been spending all her time writing papers and studying for exams, with zero time allowed for fun or hygiene.  But now all she has left is to finish up an extremely time-consuming paper. 

She's been expecting to pull an all-nighter the day before it's due, and thus told Sarah that she'll be in the lounge all that night and won't come back to the room until the next morning (when she'll take an overdue shower before she goes to hand in her paper).  Unbeknownst to Kiki, Sarah takes this opportunity to invite a boy over for sex. 

But when Kiki is working on the paper her brain starts moving slower and slower.  At one point she nods off, and wakes up a few minutes later with her face on her laptop, having typed 6 pages consisting only of the letter "F."  So she decides she needs to get a few hours' sleep if she's going to finish the paper in a coherent way, and comes back to the dorm and goes to bed.  With Kiki in the room, Sarah and her boytoy can't have sex. 

The next morning she wakes up with no time to lose.  She has to finish her paper before class begins, as well as eat breakfast, clean her overripe body, and deal with the large solid mass coming down her pipeline.  To make matters worse, Sarah is bitching at Kiki for changing her plans without prior notice, forcing her to change her own plans for that night.

So there's the setup I came up with.  What do you think?

Quote from: Jimmy Olsen on October 21, 2009, 02:54:00 PM
You wanted an explanation for why the girl in the picture was multitasking, and here's what I had in mind:

The characters are college roommates (who are lucky enough to have a bathroom in their room).  One is a Japanese girl who I'll call Kiki for the sake of this synopsis, the other is a bitchy American who I'll call Sarah.  It's Finals Week and Kiki is overworked and overstressed.  She's even been taking anti-diarrhea pills to prevent the stress-induced diarrhea she always gets on Finals Weeks.  She's been spending all her time writing papers and studying for exams, with zero time allowed for fun or hygiene.  But now all she has left is to finish up an extremely time-consuming paper. 

She's been expecting to pull an all-nighter the day before it's due, and thus told Sarah that she'll be in the lounge all that night and won't come back to the room until the next morning (when she'll take an overdue shower before she goes to hand in her paper).  Unbeknownst to Kiki, Sarah takes this opportunity to invite a boy over for sex. 

But when Kiki is working on the paper her brain starts moving slower and slower.  At one point she nods off, and wakes up a few minutes later with her face on her laptop, having typed 6 pages consisting only of the letter "F."  So she decides she needs to get a few hours' sleep if she's going to finish the paper in a coherent way, and comes back to the dorm and goes to bed.  With Kiki in the room, Sarah and her boytoy can't have sex. 

The next morning she wakes up with no time to lose.  She has to finish her paper before class begins, as well as eat breakfast, clean her overripe body, and deal with the large solid mass coming down her pipeline.  To make matters worse, Sarah is bitching at Kiki for changing her plans without prior notice, forcing her to change her own plans for that night.

So there's the setup I came up with.  What do you think?

Definately liking it so far. All I need is an idea of how to make the dump, shower, paper, and breakfest all play out without seeming chaotic *and I mean confusing to read, of course it's going to be chaos for our poor overworked lead :P*

Hurray! ;D I hope to read it soon.

Quote from: Jimmy Olsen on October 22, 2009, 01:13:28 PM
Hurray! ;D I hope to read it soon.

Well do you have any ideas on to make her day fun and chaotic? I mean, it's needs to have a good flow, not just bump from one problem to another. We need to figure how the bad combination of eating, typing, dumping, and grooming will spell utter disaster for our unlucky heorine, of course I figure she catch a break in the end, but it's always what comes before the ending that's so fun!  ;D

I'll work on the problem in my head and post what I come up with tomorrow.

By the way, don't call the Asian girl "Kiki" in the final draft.  I've used that name in at least one fic on this site.

Wasn't really planning to. Either way, don't really see a problem with two unrelatted characters having the same name. But I'm sure I can come up with a good name in time.

Here's what I got.  I'll be gone from Nyou Fiction for a whiel.

Chisa (I'm calling the main character Chisa now) wakes up, quickly assesses the situation, and springs into action.  She throws off her jammies and undies, gets food from the fridge, boots up her laptop, and puts it all in the bathroom next to the toilet.  Then she jumps into the shower, squirts shampoo on her head, and jumps out.  Sarah is in the shower while this happens, and isn't pleased. 

Chisa then sets up on the toilet, within reach of the sink.  She tries to eat, drink her soda, urinate, defecate, type her paper, scrub the shampoo into her hair, and scrub under her arms and between her legs with the soap they keep next to the sink.  She then has to multitask further, since Sarah yells at her about the girl-on-girl surprise in the shower, leaves the bathroom to get dressed, then comes back in and yells at her about the unannounced return to the room last night, going into a spiel about how every one of her attempts at ending her current sex-drought has been thwarted and she's really frustrated.  Chisa tries to defend herself and to convince Sarah that it's not healthy to be so horny, and Sarah eventually leaves her alone in the bathroom (either because Chisa has a good point or because Chisa has bad gas). 

Everything Chisa's doing is going all right so far.  She's eaten part of her breakfast, emptied her bladder, and typed so much that all she has left is the concluding paragraph, which is fully formed in her head.  Next step is to empty her bowels and go back into the shower for a brief full-body rinse.  But things stop going perfectly when she gets shampoo on the neck of her soda bottle and takes a drink.  She spits it out involuntarily, then tries to wash the shampoo off her hands without getting off the toilet.  But the shampoo falls down into her eyes and she can't see.  She doesn't want to put the laptop on the floor, since it could get stepped on, so she quickly (and blindly) takes it out of the bathroom to her desk. 

Unbeknownst to her, Mark, Sarah's guy from last night, dropped by to tell her about an end-of-Finals party, and they've been talking in the non-bathroom part of the room.  A naked, wet, and soapy Chisa runs out of the bathroom with her folded-up laptop and runs right into the Mark, knocking him on the floor.  She assumes it's Sarah and apologizes, then puts down her laptop and runs back, hitting him again as he's trying to stand up.  He lands on his back and she lands on top of him.  When he says, "Hi, you must be Chisa," Chisa finally realizes what's going on.  She gets off him and runs back into the bathroom in embarrassment, and Sarah notices that Mark has an erection.  So she switches from yelling at Chisa to yelling at him.  "How come you never got stiff that quick for me?!  Aren't my boobs Asian enough!?!" 

Back in the bathroom, Chisa rinses off.  Sarah shouts to her that it's safe to come out, so she bursts out the door naked, towelling herself off as she walks, and gets to her laptop.  Only then does she realize that the computer has been frozen since she spit soda on it.  She throws a fit, then realizes that it might only be the keyboard and touchpad that are broken, so she digs through Sarah's things (still naked, of course) until she finds Sarah's mouse and hooks it up.  The mouse works. 

So she sets back up on the toilet, running the mouse along her thigh since there's no room for a mousepad, and tries to finish her breakfast, void her bowels, save the file, and e-mail the file to herself so she can access it from the computer of Amber, her friend down the hall who will definitely be nice enough to help her out.  This last part isn't completed before the next interruption.  She is stuffing her face and pushing her first fecal mass out when Sarah bursts in again.  "Me and Mark just made up over texts, and he wants to have a three-way tonight.  Are you in?"

This startles Chisa so badly that she chokes on her food.  She stands up and flails around, but still can't unblock her throat.  Sarah does the Heimlich Maneuver on her, which squeezes out the food blockage, but also squeezes something out of her anus and onto the front of Sarah's jeans.  Sarah is so startled that she loses her balance and falls on her butt.  Her arms are still around Chisa's middle, so she falls down too.  At that moment, Chisa's colon becomes empty, and Sarah ends up with a mud pie on her lap.  Chisa thanks Sarah earnestly for saving her life, even to the point of hugging and kissing the other girl, but for Sarah this lapful of feces is the last straw.  She picks up the naked Chisa like a child and forcibly throws her out the door into the hallway.  Then she starts throwing her stuff out after her. 

When the laptop comes out, Chisa grabs it and heads for Amber's room.  The clock is ticking, and she doesn't have time to wait for Sarah to throw her clothes out.  So she bursts into Amber's room naked with a dirty bottom, laptop in hand, and explains the situation at a machine gun pace.  This is awkward, especially because Amber's parents are visiting her at the time, along with her little brother.  Amber makes Chisa go into her bathroom for reasons of decency, and promises to solve her computer and clothes problems immediately.  Chisa takes this opportunity to finally wipe. 

In moments, Amber has transferred Chisa's file to her own computer, and it's ready for the other girl to write the final paragraph.  Unfortunately Amber is much taller than Chisa, and so the only things that even sorta fit her are bras, panties, and the like.  Chisa settles for Amber's bikini, and finishes her paper and prints it out. 

Then, wearing only a swimsuit and sandals, Chisa runs across campus to deliver it to the classroom before the hour of the deadline.  She turns a few heads in the process.  The paper almost blows away at one point, and she needs to keep it secured.  Without a backpack or folder, or even pockets, her only option is to roll it up and stick it down the front of her bikini top, between her breasts.  She gets to the room with just seconds to spare, whips the paper out (causing her top to fall off), unrolls it, and puts it in the basket.  Her professor tells her that this fanservice isn't the way to get extra credit.

^^^ Win!  8)

I concur, that story sounds awesome!

You like me!  You really like me!  ;D

Feel free to write this without my input, Orpheum.  I'm fine with you or anyone else using these ideas, just so long as the story doesn't describe masturbation OR overt lesbianism (although awkward girl-to-girl contact is okay).  I'll review the result when I have a reliable computer again.

As many of you know, I've been working on a novel for quite some time. And while I'm probably a good while from being completely, absolutely, 100% finished. I have been comtemplating what I should do regarding publishing. My late mother had told me that doing it online is the way to go, as the internet is the new 'in' for being 'discovered'. Of course, it's a lot more dangerous to publish over the internet as anyone could steal someone's idea and get away with it far easier than stealing a physical manuscript.

The question is, where do I even start? Of course I would have to find a site where I know I'll get exposure and readers who can read samplings of the story, both to give needed critiques and general opinions of the work. But also for possible publishers that would take me in. One thing my mother had mentioned was a likely need to sign a contract with whoever agrees to publish my work online, as it would ensure a safe control of the literature. This can be disconcerning as I certainly don't want the work to hampered or made unavailible for distribution for a limited time, as I want it to be published shortly after it's been completed.

One possible thought I had was DeviantArt, as it is the type of place for Authors as well as artists to get exposure of their works, but I know the site isn't as popular as Facebook/Myspace/Twitter when it comes to the general public *that is, you don't hear about it on tv as much*. FictionPress, Fanfiction's spin-off site is another possible choice, but like the latter, is fairly obscure as well.

Any ideas or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

My advice is this: Only put a few chapters up as a taster while you look for an agent and work on the rest. Don't put it all up on dART. I'm in the process of writing a novel as well, and have the first 3 chapters up on dART and nowhere else, so I can get some CC and opinions while I work on the other chapters.

Well of course I wouldn't post the whole thing. Just chapters I want the most opinions of on. Although I would probably have to do some shortening and ripping so I could show off as many choice parts and not worry about when I delete a part that someone might have copied the thing. Granted, the law on Copyright is that once I've merely thought of something, it's mine, and when it's written, it's impossible for someone to just steal it away.

A really nice song from one of my favorite PS2 games. There's four others by the same artist (Nadia Gifford), they're really good. But this is favorite among the five.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cydi72HkBog

A blaring desert, sand kicked up by harsh winds swirls all around. A lone figure appears in the distant, cloaked in a heavy cloth and wearing a large straw hat.

Cue dramatic music, like the start of an epic film

Suddenly trips over the the body of a heavily bandaged man in a long trenchcoat (Schwarzwald). Stumbles to feet and stares at the body.

Who the fuck is that?  ???

Anyway, it is I! Yes, I have returned after a week long absence! *Though I guess no one really noticed I was gone... :-[* But I was, my computer wouldn't open IE for a whole week, the windwows would always close and AOL wouldn't start at all. For a while it seemed like the end of my comp, but earlier this evening *when it was still Wednesday* I used a recently purchased 8GB Flash drive to save my favorites in preparation of a possible file loss, and lo and behold when I tried AIM *which would seem to work during the crisis* I found my interent working properly once more!

Of course I may have to disappear again in a while, but that all depends on whether or not I do have to go with a massive reboot of the computer to solve my issues, which seemed to have stemmed from a spam program called "Personal Guard 2009".

Oh... and there's a new Sakura story, enjoy!  ;D

Well, *I* was wondering where you were. Good to have you back!

Sounds like your computer could use a reformat, but maybe it'd be more trouble than it's worth.

I just caught up on one piece. It has turned into a perfect source for our insane minds, and your upcoming story with the introduction of the character Jewelry bonney;

(http://img3.ak.crunchyroll.com/i/spire1/7742bb098f484e55f12e369a91447db11249775445_full.gif)

Apparently the author used Gal Sone as an inspiration for her, but increased her eating abilities 100 times.  8)

I'd immagine her personal quarters to just be a seat into the open ocean due to issues with a normal toilets capacity.

Wow, I had recalled hearing that her apettite was on par with Luffy's but didn't really think much of it. Jeesus, a story with her would have to be roughly like my CC story, just 90% focus on pooping action!  8) (not that it would be a bad thing, :P ;D) While I'm still pretty far behind on the series myself (as I'm watching the FUNI dvds) I might be able to conjur something up if I take some time to look into her character.

Yea its a good opportunity, but I still think the idea of Robin plugging the toilet with her big round butt due to being so into her reading she forgets to courtesy flush is more original at least.

I wonder if she uses her devil fruit ability to wipe her ass, or maybe operate the flush/plunger without needing to put down her book with her original hands. The mystery!  ???

It's certainly within the realm of possibility... (I've been playing Professor Layton like crazy!  :-[). Both gals would make excellent models for a story (as we saw with Nami-swan  ;)) so of course the voluptuous archeologist deserves a starring role herself. That could be a fun read, since Robin has shown some multi-tasking skills, she could easily be pinching a loaf, reading, and flushing at regular intervals to keep the toilet from plugging up. Oh the possiblities that come with these kind of gals.  ;D

I'm actually in the process of catching up on One Piece myself, I'm reading the manga online.  I just finished chapter 480 (near the end of "Thriller Bark") a few minuets ago so I still have a lot of reading to do but I have read over two hundred chapters in just a few weeks. ;D

Since we know that Robin has had her ability from when she was little, and uses it for everyday things besides fighting and survival, I have no doubt she would employ it in the bathroom.  I can picture her reading in her chair when she suddenly has to go, she gets up, opens the bathroom door, closes and locks it, and when she's done, wipes and flushes without ever putting down her book.  Plus, she don't have to wash her hands. ;D  I suppose, since the artist has implied she can copy any body part, Robin could just "sprout" another butt out of the wall next to the toilet, but that would probably take a lot of concentration and could get a little hectic if Nami was already sitting there! ;)

SPOILERS

I liked how Sanji got pissed fighting the lion-face guy because he ate the only invisibility fruit after Sanji had spent his whole live thinking of ways to use it spy on girls.  I'm sure the the original was referring to girls changing and showering or whatever, but the translation I read just says "peeking in girl's bathrooms." :kawaii:  At the end of the fight, Sanji says it's ok because he can spy on girls without invisibility.  Nami and Robin better be be sure to lock the door... :P 

Quote from: DrBones on January 01, 2010, 10:16:53 PM
I suppose, since the artist has implied she can copy any body part, Robin could just "sprout" another butt out of the wall next to the toilet, but that would probably take a lot of concentration and could get a little hectic if Nami was already sitting there! ;)

Sounds like you've got yourself a story there!  ;D

I actually had a similar idea once, except Robin sprouted a butt on the hull of the ship and pooped, while doing something else in the mean time.  :P

Been playing Uncharted 2, and have to say it is one of the best damn games I've played! I mean, it does what games like Metal Gear and countless others should be, letting you have control during the 'cinematic' parts. Anyway, it goes without saying that the girls in the game are downright hot! Especially Chloe and her fantastic ass! Now this brings me to a little idea I had. In the 6th or 7th chapter, Drake and her enter a busted up hotel, and take an elevator to get to the top, only for it to get stuck part way. Drake gets out, but Chloe is left inside and the power to it is on another floor. Well, I thought a fun scenario would be that Chloe answers the call of nature while she waits for Drake to get the shaft moving again.

Given Naughty Dog's nature, I wouldn't put it past them if they were to put in some toilet humour in one of their games. If anyone else is familar with the game, maybe they could think of a fun little 'what if?' piece to go along with that part of the game. I would try myself, but right now I thought it'd be fun to see what others thought.

*Guess whose back begins playing. Jets and fireworks go off in massive fanfare*

Munchin: He has returned!

*A truck wheels in, the cab explodes, but it's empty.... Camera pans over to nearby deli, where I sit having a soda*

So what? I'm finally back, big fucking deal.

*BIG FUCKING DEAL appears in bold illuminated letters behind, the bulps popping in sequence*

Enough joking around, I'm back. My old comp's video driver died and I just got a new rig a couple of hours ago. So in case any of you were worried, no, I ain't dead. Like Gibbs, I don't die.

As you know, I've finally returned after a sudden absence. Hopefully the suicide numbers weren't too high and that we haven't lost any major personel.

Well, I figured I should be back on track by the end of May, but I won't swear to that. While I've been able to copy and move my stuff from the external device I had my old harddrive copied to, I can't seem to get my wordperfect files to work, all of them now say they're 'WPD' or something weird like that. If anyone can help me figure out a way to change them back to normal or at least into something that's like Wordperfect, I'd appreciate the help.

And as a little treat to garner some interest in helping me, I've got an idea for an Uncharted 2 story featuring the bootilicious Chloe. So, the quicker I can get back into the game, the quicker we can all enjoy a nice story where the sexy Aussy girl drops trou.  ;D

Quote from: OrpheumZero on April 30, 2010, 02:15:37 PM
Well, I figured I should be back on track by the end of May, but I won't swear to that. While I've been able to copy and move my stuff from the external device I had my old harddrive copied to, I can't seem to get my wordperfect files to work, all of them now say they're 'WPD' or something weird like that. If anyone can help me figure out a way to change them back to normal or at least into something that's like Wordperfect, I'd appreciate the help.

Have you tried OpenOffice? I believe that can open up the .wpd files.

Okay, that seems to be working. Just hope the stupid java script thing doesn't get too interfering. Anyway, it's good to be back.

it's great to see you back! , I was actually getting a little worried about ya.

Same to you, I know you were kinda low key for a while.

yeah, I'm doing better now, I had started on redoing that old part of the fic you helped with, but I now I've gotten side tracked working on a flash typing game, lol

Hah, know what you mean, I'm being a bit lazy into getting back to my writing but I'll saddle soon and start doing what needs to be done. I was actually in the middle of chapter for a story when my old comp died.

Still getting back into the hang of things with this new comp. Since the External harddrive is a bit wonky when it comes to finding all the programs, it's not too problematic to just download them again on this machine. I got HJsplit since I recall that was good for joining files, but I can't remember what I used for rar files, anyone know a good program?

7zip  works good, it don't pack rar files though, but it can open rar files just fine.

Actually I was able to get something for that. But thanks anyway. Just wish the site wasn't so dead lately, lol

Quote from: OrpheumZero on May 16, 2010, 10:09:12 PM
Actually I was able to get something for that. But thanks anyway. Just wish the site wasn't so dead lately, lol

yeah I wish it was more active too.

While I don't normally fish for ideas here in regards to my works on FF.net, I'm feeling more inclined since the forums theres have barely proven to be any help or the ones on Deviantart. Seriously, WHY THE FUCK IS SO WRONG FOR ME TO ASK ABOUT SONG TITLES?!? >:( >:( >:( >:( All I want are some good song, album, or bands names for chapter names, and yet all I get in response is "hurr durrrr. why are you asking that here... how does this relate to workshop writting? durrrr ddurrrrr" God damn, does anyone have a fucking knowledge of music anymore or I am just fucking insane and think that others know?....

:-[.... Calming down. Now what I've been trying to look for are names of songs to use in a long-running fanfiction I'm doing. Much like the episodes of Cowboy Bebop, each chapter is named after a song (though one is named after an album and another a genre of music), and what I like to look for are ones that can relate to each chapter. An example is the first chaper titled "Boy meets Girl", which has been used as a song name for years, and also fits with the fact that the main character wakes up to see a girl tending to his injuries. Now the latest chapter is meant to take place in a desert and even have a scene at an oasis. What I'm looking for is a song that would fit with the theme of the chapter (sand, hot, oasis, exotic, etc), but the only tune I can think of is "Desert Rose" by Sting. While I'm not totally against using that, I just thought maybe I'd fish around for ideas.

At least here I know I'm not gonna get badgered by fucking idiots.

Hurr...  :xm0014: :009: :008: :005:

"Walk like an Egyptian"

HURRR DURR

DERKA HERP DERRRPPP   :005: :015: :012: :009: :009: :poop:


Joke aside, there is a song on the cowboy bebop soundtrack that fits that description perfectly, can't think of the name right now. Think it's in one of the early episodes.

Quote from: yarr on July 29, 2010, 09:09:14 PM
Hurr...  :xm0014: :009: :008: :005:

"Walk like an Egyptian"

HURRR DURR

DERKA HERP DERRRPPP   :005: :015: :012: :009: :009: :poop:


Joke aside, there is a song on the cowboy bebop soundtrack that fits that description perfectly, can't think of the name right now. Think it's in one of the early episodes.

*Swinging mallet over shoulder* Hmm, you mean Mushroom Samba? That's all I can I recall of Cowboy Bebop involving a dersert theme.

This is a cool idea.  I'm going something similar with the novel I'm writing.  There's a character in it known as "the Foreigner," and every chapter featuring him is named after a Foreigner album.

Anyway, here are some off the top of my head.

~Silver Sands (Stereolab)
~Every Grain of Sand (Bob Dylan)
~Sand in My Shoes (Dido)
~Sand in My Eyes (Miss B. Haven)
~Sandstorm (Darude)
~Déserts (Edgard Varèse)
~Looking for Water (David Bowie)
~Rio (Duran Duran)
~Rio Grande Moon (the Memphis Rockabilly Band)
~Frantic Desolation (Sopwith Camel)
~Cactus (Black Francis)
~The Dark of the Sun (Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers)
~Melting in the Sun (E.L.O.)
~Burning (O.M.D.)
~Slow Burn (David Bowie)
~Walkin' on the Sun (Smash Mouth)
~Weather the Weather (the Postmarks)
~Unusual Heat (Foreigner)

Nice. Thanks for the list. I just don't know what people were getting my face about. Someone said something about the syntax, but I don't see how "You see, I'm looking for song titles to use as chapter names. I like for each to have some relation to the chapter." Doesn't seem that confusing to me... Anyway.

But definately a nice selection. I would use those official music databases, but how do you search for dozens of songs that may only share loose connections like 'sand' 'oasis' 'hot' or something like that? Far as I know, most search engines run off keywords that either find related bands or song titles, not the possible themes they have. I mean, all songs can be interpreted in different ways. Like the song "Forgotten" by Linkin' Park. To most, it may sound like a song about someone whose been neglected or shunned by the people they care about. To me? I actually spun out the narrative for my next novel about a kid whose resented by his peers and runs away to a world of shadow.

I guess while I'm at it I should mention that chapter 9 of the story is temporarily named "Splitting up", which is by some group called Adequate 7 or something. While not a bad song named, as the chapter will largely focus on (at least for the initial act) a band member leaving his friends to pursue a solo career. Now of course an obvious choice could be "Breaking up is hard to do" but I'm sure I'm probably missing a ton of possible references.

By the way, I should mention this fanfic is based on the game Steambot Chronicles.

Also, I'm (finally) starting work on that 'Multitasker' fic with the girl trying to take a dump, eat something, and do a report all at once. I figured what I'll do is write it out, then see if someone here can do a proofread to fine-tune it.

I'm glad to hear about the multitasker story!  ^-^

As for the chapter titles, I'd do a keyword search if I were you.  It's better than nothing.

Quote from: Jimmy Olsen on July 30, 2010, 03:35:42 PM
I'm glad to hear about the multitasker story!  ^-^

As for the chapter titles, I'd do a keyword search if I were you.  It's better than nothing.

If you're interested in doing the proofread, just give me the word. I should be able to finish it in a few hours if I keep at it.

I'd love to, but I'm really busy right now.  I'm training for a teaching job, and I'm already proofreading my friend's boring fantasy novel.

By the way, I thought of another song: "Blue Veils and Golden Sands" by Delia Derbyshire.

Well then, if anyone thinks they could do proofreading, just say so.

Getting a bit late. But I should be able to finish the story by tomorrow. Just hope that someone can help do the proofread.

On second thought, I might consider proofreading it, depending on how long it is.

Probably about 7-10 pages, at least when I'm done. Whatever you do may extend it, of course that would an improvement.  :P

10 pages?  I'd be surprised if that's more than 7,000 words.  Send it on over when you're done, if you don't mind the proofreading taking a while.

Just to clarify, do you want me to just fix the spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors, or actually revise/rewrite/expand it?

Whatever you feel would help improve it. I'm basically writing it to the best of my abilities considering I'm not too that good at doing choatic things like this. If you feel any parts need expanding, you can add in parts, or just leave notes in the spaces between paragraphs. Right now I'm only on page 3, but should be done in a while, either later tonight or early tomorrow. We'll just have to wait and see how it comes along I guess.  :P

Well it should only be a few more days before Jimmy finishes proofreading my newest story.  ;D Stay tuned!

Just posted "Deadline" the long awaited story based on that "Multitasker" picture.

Jimmy should be recognized as co-author, having helped proofread and add a chock full of additional content.

I'd love to hear what you think of my additions.

It's posted now.

Looks like everything is finally working out.

Anyway. I did like the extened parts, though I will say some felt a little tacked on, like you could (well, me really) see where your stuff was switching back to what I had done. Otherwise it was pretty funny stuff.

I just looked, and the version you posted is one of my earlier drafts.  There are some sentences with missing words, and pieces of dialog where I was confused about which person was talking.  Can you please post the latest version I sent you?  Also, there's a tag that will let you center the title etc.

And yeah, I got the name "Chisa" from Saikano.  I wouldn't care if you changed it.

What tag is that?

Anyway, it's been reposted. I still included some of the edits I made as well.

It still has the mistakes.  Maybe I sent you the wrong version.  Here, I'll send the fully corrected version, with the centering tags added.

What mistakes? Looks like everything was there this time. I still had to change the commas and space a few sentences but otherwise it looks right as ever.

There are a lot of different embarrassing mistakes.  The dialog is screwed up in 2 places, because I lost track of which character was talking.  There's a part about the printer in the wrong spot, long before she tries to print the paper.  Just a lot of things like that.  Please put up the one I sent you last night.

Which lines exactly? I'd hate to have to go through another copy and do my adjustments all over again for a third time.

I made a lot of changes throughout.  It would take me forever to locate them all. 

Maybe some other time. I'm pretty sure I covered any immediate myself in the present version.

What changes did you make?

I really think you should put up the corrected version.  There are serious problems that affect the clarity, and it's bothering me.

Haven't you read it here yet?

So far I've only skimmed it and checked the parts with the memorable mistakes.  After reading it twice during the proofreading phase, I wasn't keen to read it all again just yet.

Well when you have the time to, just tell which lines and then I can copy over and paste the improved ones. Though I would you're talking about the little back and forths where it's "blah blah" "blah" "blah blah" and then finally says who is presently talking. And yes, I'll admit those things can be misleading if they go on for too many lines without reestablishing whose talking.

I can do that, but it will take a long time to find them all.

Well, I'm pretty floored; I'd say great job to both of you. TBH, I wasn't really reading with as discerning an eye as I sometimes do, but that is because I got taken in by the actual story. There was maybe 1 situation where I wasn't entirely certain of something, but I can't remember what it was now so it doesn't count.

I might do a more thorough review later, after I read it again.

And again.

Glad you like it!  I still haven't had time to find and mark all the edits.

In case you're blind (or LivingInfinite  :P), I've added a brand new "alternate" chapter to my Resident Evil story "Sometimes you just gotta go".

Just posted a new challenge.

Had an idea for another challenge that I might post soon.

Well post it, now that you've got us curious!

I (re)posted Omnipresent's "Tools of the Trade" Evangelion story. And even changed it to his name as it was still his original document and not another remake like the Asuka's Accidents or the Lain story. Enjoy it, folks.  ;D

Finally. I got my entry for the story contest put up. While probably not my strongest entry, I think everyone will get a kick out of it.

I've started trying to get some work on the Microfilm story. But I figured I might ask for some notes about what could happen and what not. Like, how should it begin? And where should it take place?

Right now I've got it set in South America and just having Wolf hitching a ride under a jeep. But of course it'd be cool to get some ideas for possible things to happen.

Toasty, if you're reading this, maybe you've got some ideas, you did afterall come up with a great setting for your Sniper Wolf fic.

Still need some input on what could go into the Sniper Wolf story, but I'll try to see what I can type out myself in the mean time. Also, I update the Ucharted 2 story. Hopefully it should read out a lot better this time around.

Jimmy and I were talking about a scene where Sniper Wolf was sniping at someone, and someone else sneaks up on her and causes her to have an accident from the fright. I even started making a comic page about it...

Yea but that doesn't even relate to the main plot device; her carrying a microfilm. Obviously the story would start with her infiltrating a base to retrieve it, but I need to figure out some ideas as to why she would ingest the film, how it won't get damaged inside her, and then circumstances that allow enough time to let it get to her bowels in a timely fashion so it's not jumping from point to point to point.

I have a plot for your Sniper Wolf story.  I know next to nothing about Metal Gear, so this plot may be useless and/or nonsensical.

Wolf's enemies have stolen some secret McGuffin which is in some bizarre analog format so as to make it highly difficult to decrypt or copy it (but not impossible).  Wolf's people do not have a backup copy.  Wolf breaks in with the gadget that reads it, and uses that to make sure this is the real deal and not a decoy.  She steals it and escapes, but is pursued.  Ultimately she's captured and taken prisoner, and the tape and tape-reader fall into the hands of her enemies.  But when the techies try to use the tape-reader on the tape, it bombards it with particles that destroy its data, then the reader overheats to destroy its own usefulness.  What they don't know is that the reader downloaded the info in digital form into an almost microscopic microchip.  Just before Wolf was captured, she swallowed it.  Her people knew she might have to do that, so the chip is encased in a pill that can pass through her body without harming her or the data.  She's resourceful, and she escapes, still carrying the chip in her innards.

Wolf's enemies eventually discover that the tape-reader was designed to download the information into something, and they somehow figure out that Wolf swallowed it.  When they recapture her (hours or days later), they strip her, tie her to a potty, and force-feed her laxatives.  She escapes from bondage, steals her/somebody's clothes, and tries to break out of the compound again.  Her stomach is churning from the laxatives, but she has control.  She makes it out of the compound alive, but a brush with death makes her lose her control.  She can't change because the chip's in the mess somewhere.  Back at her headquarters (or whatever) the chip is retrieved from her poopy undies.

Will that plot work? 

Oh yeah, I forgot all about the original idea. WOOPS

Jimmy, love your idea. I just wish there were some way for her to be sniping, because that's like, the thing she's actually good at.

Maybe she has to kill the person who's transporting the tape for the bad guys. 

Well what I currently wrote out is this:

Wolf is in the South Americas (not specified where, just somewhere) and already about to infiltrate a radical group's base (an old prison) by hiding under their jeep. They didn't catch anyone's attention until they stole some intel from an American owned facility on an island nearby. So the basic idea is to get her inside, find the device, and so on. But the idea that she makes a duplicate/replacement sounds interesting. Now it's just a matter of figuring out how to make it progress so it doesn't jump around from point to point until she finally "relinquishes" the microfilm.

Quote from: OrpheumZero on January 09, 2011, 05:24:01 AM
Now it's just a matter of figuring out how to make it progress so it doesn't jump around from point to point until she finally "relinquishes" the microfilm.

That's why I came up with the idea of her being imprisoned for a while before they realize she ingested a copy of the data, and her escaping and being recaptured later.  That should provide enough time to get the microchip from Point A to Point B(utt).

Finally made that Sniper Wolf story, now shut up and read it!  ;D

New story! This one based on Heavy Rain! Go read it, now! Go! DO EET!  ;D

I finally got around to reading and reviewing your latest Sniper Wolf story.  Great job!

You know, given how that KissxSis series seems to be getting more and more popular, I'm amazed no one has tried to write a story for that by now. From what I've gleamed, you've got two cute sisters willing to do anything for their step-brother, a cute girl with glasses who has pissed herself numerous times, and pretty much is a hentai without the obscene amounts of pointless sex scenes. Seriously though, FallenStar could easily have a field day with the glasses girl and her peeing escapades, while the sisters could easily fit a number of stories (competitive pooping, anyone?  ;))

If I was more familiar with the series, I probably would try my hand. Sadly I haven't had much chance to see anything beyond a few scenes here and there.

But this show is still porn, right?

I would say it's extremely softcore porn, yeah, so far as eroticism is its primary goal, even though it has an actual story and characters. I don't believe any actual copulation (in the traditional sense) has taken place in the series so far. Just attractive people that happen to be caught in awkwardly titillating scenarios. It's a pretty fine line, though.

Yes, after some serious downtime, here's a new story!

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=533 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=533)

Inspired by this picture: [smg id=6033]

I like your rendition of the story's big scene. I was hoping you could illustrate the scene of Sarah on the toilet int his story:
http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=281 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=281)

I can't draw! I've mentioned that before.

I hope we can find someone willing to give it a try.

You've got half a dozen artists on Deviantart doing requests for you.  Ask one of them.

Before I forget or get distracted, I need to make it clear that I'll be gone from the 24th of this month until around the 20th or so of February. My family is finally getting rid of the house we've had for 22 years and I have to go help move out what we're keeping and sort the stuff the new owners will deal with. So I'll see you guy soon. Hopefully I'll make it for the next contest maybe.

I'm back...... bitches  =D

Been watching the new Avatar series, Legend of Korra. So far, it's great. Korra is a fucking badass, a fun babe to boot.

Which got to me thinking (of course), how does she take her dumps? Does she try to be quiet and discreet? Or would she just let go of all thoughts of pleasentries and just shit like a raging Sky Bison is trying to crawl out of her ass? :P

Personally, I think she's loud and crude. Probably would have made Toph proud to see such an unlady like lady.  ;)

Amen. I'm liking her so far and I too think she shits loud and messy. It would be funny to see Tenzin and his families faces when they see/hear her take a dump.

(Would poo play be water or earth bending?)

Hell, imagine how Bolin or Mako would react if they saw Korra dropping logs.

Also, we've already had a debate many moons ago concerning bending and poo.

Oh really?  :-[ Never saw it before. I'll have to check it out later.

Seriously. We need an artist to depict Korra on the toilet shitting like she's got no class while Bolin and Mako overhear it (possibly even trying not to, ala Harold & Kumar). Though I wouldn't say Sx2, if only because he's more about fetishising the body as well. Shame Micro and Waru aren't into art much anymore...

Hey, we know that Malachi is a pretty big Avatar fan. After all, we have him to thank for those mind-blowingly great pictures of Toph and Katara "earth bending". Hopefully he'll show his appreciation for the new series in the same way as well.

Speaking of which, does anyone actually know if there's any sites or forums where Malachi hangs around? What happened to that guy? I've only ever seen his stuff reposted secondhand on imageboards and the like. Maybe we could..."motivate" him.

(Wait a minute, why did I just put the word "motivate" in quotes? I'm not even implying anything there. I seriously think we could actually just motivate him by asking nicely.)

I don't know. Haven't seen hide nor hair of him for a while. The last major thing I think he did was that Sailor Mercury pic. I recall he was possibly gonna do a follow up to the Sailor Moon manga he made, or at least was considering it.

yeah I haven't seen him in a bit over a month now. though his last couple of pics are nice, though they not nyou themed.

Here's my entry for the contest:

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=581 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=581)

And here's the inspiring picture:
[smg id=5036]


Edit: Fixed a few spellilng errors in the story. If I missed any, just mention them in a review.

Made an upate to my old Resident Evil 4 story. Though I can't remember if there is a way to make the thing bump itself when it's update, lol.

Too tired to figure it out. But check it out if you're interested. Might do another update with the second version...

Updated both chapters. And here are some pictures that have ties to the story.

[smg id=151]
This one is actually an edit that me and some of the older crew played around with way back on the original Nyou site. The dialogue was what I added in the original edit, before Micro I believe modified it to look like this... or was it Waru?  :P

[smg id=56]
A commission made by LivingInfinite that I requested after making a story to his liking. Largely inspired by Anime Lover's own RE4 story, which was what inspired my two Ashley tales.

Did a minor update to the second chapter of the Fullmetal Alchemist stories. Nothing major, just a few tweaks.

Just reupped the 4th chapter (Sheska) with some tweaks.

Just drummed up a new One Piece story, again featuring our favorite navigator, Nami-swan! This time, the story is set as a sort of "lost scene" during the Whisky Peak arc of the Baroque Works saga.

*Edit* Note to self, try and not post a message while half asleep, lol

I put up two unfinished stories from Gurochan's literature board. Shame really, both had a lot of promise, but their respective authors have either given up or vanished. Though, if anyone does get inspire to finish them, I could always make the story a round robin and let whoever wishes to "continue" do so.

I found "A Space Immodesty" interesting, and it seems like you could get a lot of use out of that universe.  Space and war can provide scenarios for desperation.  There could also be an interesting bathroom scene with more than one girl.  Maybe Juniper realizes a woman is an alien spy because the uses the toilet in a way no human would.  And there's always alien toilets.  It would be especially interesting if Juniper was captured by aliens.  You also haven't described a normal modern toilet in this universe.  That could be interesting, especially if Juniper has to instruct a novice on how to use it.  Finally, maybe she gets in trouble with her commander for being on duty while desperate.  He could make an example out of her by forcing her to mess herself in front of everybody before they head out to combat.

Certainly something to think about. But I'm not sure. Of course, don't be afraid to use your own ideas with your future series.  ;)

Shame there aren't more pictures with girls using alien/high tech bogs. We need them!

Yeah, there need to be more weird toilet pictures.

If you do some searching, you'll find pictures of weird modern toilets on the Internet to fuel your imagination.  Sadly they never include photos of women using them.  The same websites that will show nearly nude models lying in futuristic beds are somehow too repressive to show a model seated on a toilet.

Posted a new story. Another One Piece inspired romp, this time featuring Robin!  =D

Drumming up another story.... slowly. Also thinking about redoing that Nico Robin story (which none of you seemed to have reviewed!  >:()

I also got some inspirate from this set I posted:

[smg id=7383 type=preview]

From what I can guess, the Shrine Miko (maiden/priestess) is told that she must go into the cave, and take a dump before the shrine to appease either a wrathful deity, or prevent a cataclysm of some sort. This actually reminds me of the Ritual Story I did (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=467 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=467)) a while back, except with a more defined story as opposed to the guesswork I did on that one picture. In any case, that'd be an interesting plot, a young girl has to drop trou and shit, to SAVE THE WORLD! ♫

Weird coincidence.  Last night I was thinking about the possibility of a story where a girl finds a banquet set out in the middle of nowhere and eats the food.  It turns out it was an offering to a deity, which hounds the girl but ultimately accepts her poop as a sacrifice.

Anyway, your story sounds great.

Well as I said, the small doujin basically seems to follow the idea of a "ritual/sacrifice" like the one I made, except with a set structure instead of some girl just reenacting some tradition. Though I wish I could read/understand this, since the early pages show something like a very small meal. So I'm curious if she's been holding for ages, or was forced to eat tons and that one meal is like something to help make sure she goes without trouble.

Posted a new Code Geass story.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=637&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=637&warning=3)

Updated and added newer versions of the Rukia toilet training story. Now, it should it feel closer to Omnipresent's original story.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=151&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=151&warning=3)

Added a brand new story, this time based on Silent Hill 3 of all things.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=648&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=648&warning=3)

Enjoy a little private time with Heather as she decides a monster filled office building is great a place as any to drop her pants.

Somewhat inspired by this picture.

[smg id=6865 type=preview]

Nothing too urgent of late. But I did do another slight update to my one Code Lyoko story, the one where Odd ends up in Yumi's body.

In the meantime, I'm checking out some challenges for ideas, as well as a few short stories based on some great pictures.

Sounds cool, dude.

Quote from: OrpheumZero on July 05, 2013, 07:55:26 PM
In the meantime, I'm checking out some challenges for ideas, as well as a few short stories based on some great pictures.

Which challenges and pictures?  Or is it a surprise?  Are you looking for new challenges?  I'm sure there are a lot of people here who would love to share ideas if you give a basic idea of what you're looking for.

Just fulfilled a challenge.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=690&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=690&warning=3)

Had been wanting to get back to FMA for a while, so here's a nice little reentry. I'll probably do another story soon, but no promises on how soon.

Working on a few new things. One for Code Geass, and one for Code Lyoko.

Threw together a new prequel story for my "Her secret pleasure" story. Also did a slight touch up for the original story itself.

I welcome any suggestions for improving both, so do so in the reviews, or here. But please specify what and where to apply fixes.

Not much of an update, but I did some revisions on the Sakura and Ino story. Figured it was only a little cosmetic change and not worth making it a new chapter.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=304 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=304)

Got a bit sidetracked, but should be wrapping up the Code Geass story soon enough. In the meantime, I've been thinking about some stories based on Pokémon and the Legend of Zelda, but would like to think of a neat series name for them both. I know it seems kind of irrelevant, but I like cool titles for the stories, especially the long running ones.

Speaking of Zelda, been trying to think of a good scenario for why Malon (from Ocarina of Time) would lay an egg.

i haven't played Ocarina of Time in forever, but for your Malon and egg idea, I have a couple suggestions i managed to think up real quick...

1. A dream, dreams are always a good excuse for something weird that wouldn't normally happen.
2. Perhaps she could have gotten a little too curious with an egg in a masturbation session and gets stuck inside her, which decides it wants out at the most embarrassing time.
3. she's effected by a magic spell somehow, although, the only people I can recall that have magic in the game is Zelda, those spring fairy people and Ganon, I think, so I dunno how Malon would encounter either of those people.

Quote from: OrpheumZero on August 29, 2013, 02:34:13 AM
Got a bit sidetracked, but should be wrapping up the Code Geass story soon enough. In the meantime, I've been thinking about some stories based on Pokémon and the Legend of Zelda, but would like to think of a neat series name for them both. I know it seems kind of irrelevant, but I like cool titles for the stories, especially the long running ones.

Speaking of Zelda, been trying to think of a good scenario for why Malon (from Ocarina of Time) would lay an egg.

Here's an idea:
A mysterious cloaked trader arrives and offers the traditional "cow for magic beans" trade. Malon politely refuses, but the trader doesn't seem to mind at all and even offers her a single bean as a "free sample" or whatever. It turns out that getting her to eat that sample was his real goal, and some time later she suddenly and unexpectedly finds herself laying an egg, which is actually that 'bean' she ate, having grown inside her.

Quote from: Anime Lover on August 29, 2013, 02:58:55 AM
i haven't played Ocarina of Time in forever, but for your Malon and egg idea, I have a couple suggestions i managed to think up real quick...

1. A dream, dreams are always a good excuse for something weird that wouldn't normally happen.
Actually, that was one idea I had in mind already. Since Malon is a farmgirl with only her father and one ranchhand, maybe she just has weird dreams/fantasies from boredom.
2. Perhaps she could have gotten a little too curious with an egg in a masturbation session and gets stuck inside her, which decides it wants out at the most embarrassing time.
A similar idea as well, perhaps she fucked a cucco?  :P
3. she's effected by a magic spell somehow, although, the only people I can recall that have magic in the game is Zelda, those spring fairy people and Ganon, I think, so I dunno how Malon would encounter either of those people.
Had an idea like that as well, except it would be something like an Ocarina song played by Link. In fact, I thought a bunch of little stories with Link using perverted songs might be a fun thing, and perhaps one is the "song of oviposition" or something like that, which makes a girl birth an egg.

Quote from: EnragedFilia on August 29, 2013, 05:38:19 AM
Here's an idea:
A mysterious cloaked trader arrives and offers the traditional "cow for magic beans" trade. Malon politely refuses, but the trader doesn't seem to mind at all and even offers her a single bean as a "free sample" or whatever. It turns out that getting her to eat that sample was his real goal, and some time later she suddenly and unexpectedly finds herself laying an egg, which is actually that 'bean' she ate, having grown inside her.

That's an idea, but it does seem odd a bean would make a girl lay an egg.  :P

Certainly open to more ideas. Especially for the titles.

So far, the only things I can think of would be "Trainer tales" or something for Pokémon, and "The Not so Legend of Zelda" or "Lesser known legends", something kind of catchy.

Finally finished the Code Geass story... nearly two months late. Ah, better late than never I suppose.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=698&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=698&warning=3)

Also, still looking for any ideas/suggestions for the names of the Zelda and Pokémon anthologies. And of course, any thoughts on how to do make things like Malon laying egg or whatever seem plausible in the story are welcome.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=709&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=709&warning=3)

New story up.

Quote from: OrpheumZero on July 16, 2013, 09:29:25 PM
Working on a few new things. One for Code Geass, and one for Code Lyoko.

Guess I can share a little on the Code Lyoko story; the idea would a growth/expansion based fic with Yumi and Aelita. I'm trying to figure out the exact reasons for what cause them to grow exactly. Obviously, XANA is behind it, or at least decides to dick around during the situation, as usual.

*One idea to kick off the plot is Jeremie makes a program to change the size of the Lyoko warriors' digital forms, so they can wreak havoc on the monsters. Either XANA messes with the program during a testing, or just an unforeseen bug on Jeremie's side. Whatever the case, Yumi and Aelita find themselves beginning to grow larger and larger, with the threat being both the risk of exposure to the public (and not just because of the embarrassing lack of clothes), and the fact that their bodies can't handle being so large (taken from the fact that those with gigantism have respiratory problems).

*Another just has XANA infecting people to make them grow giant and let them die of the respiratory failure.

Obviously, one thing I need to figure out is how to have Aelita still be able to get to Lyoko before she gets too big for the scanners. And I'm wondering whether to have the girls just straight up grow taller, or have spurts of growth in their hips, ass, and breasts since it would allow for a little fun. Which did make think that maybe the girls have moments where they "cool down" and return to a smaller size. Or, maybe Aelita shrinks and Yumi is the one to turn into a giantess.

Updated the "Nami takes a dump" story a little while ago. Also changed the "Tales of the Grand Line" story into just a story with Robin, while putting all of my One Piece stories into a series under that name. In the meantime, I've got some new things in the works, though I can't say WHEN they'll be up, just that I've got some stories in the works.

Quote from: OrpheumZero on December 25, 2013, 09:34:29 PM
http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=709&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=709&warning=3)

Did some cleaning up and fixed the story. Might still feel rushed, but at least it's more polished now. Still wish I could figure out how to make the things update when simply swapping newer versions of a chapter. Duce might know...

Quote from: OrpheumZero on December 21, 2012, 07:18:38 PM

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=648&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=648&warning=3)

Updated the SH3 story. Nothing radical, but corrected a few mistakes that I had missed.

I like how you're going back and improving old stories. Do you have any others planned for this?

Quote from: Zephiel on September 11, 2015, 08:04:07 PM
I like how you're going back and improving old stories. Do you have any others planned for this?

Probably all the ones that I feel need some fixing up. I had done a few about a year ago, but since I recently got a program that really helps point out errors in things, especially in the formation of my writing, I'm tempted to spruce up everything so they'll feel fresher and more professional.

Did some revisions for the Nico Robin story.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=604&warning=3 (http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=604&warning=3)

Wasn't as complex a change like the other edits I've done, so it was just a paste over with the fixed version.

http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=24&chapter=2

Spruced up the original Outlaw Star story once more, largely correcting a glaring mistake about the timeline of events for when the story was set.

Finally completed a story, meant for a contest from last year.  :P
http://nyou.animegirldesp.org/nf/viewstory.php?sid=1089&warning=3

This should be the first of hopefully several more stories I've been working on for a while now. Though I can't give any guarantees of when each one will be done. Some may even be held off until others are completed so I can just dump a bunch at once.

Alright, alright. Jesus, you're a bossy SOB :).

I read the story, good work.