My official thread of.... things I do.

[OrpheumZero]

I just posted a new story, featuring the lovely Nami of One Piece. If you haven't read it yet, read it! If you've read it already, review it!

Enjoy!

[Poowrite]

Alright, alright. Jesus, you're a bossy SOB .

I read the story, good work.

[FallenStar]

Alright, alright. Jesus, you're a bossy SOB .

I read the story, good work.

Well,  you're like the official site reviewer, so why *shouldn't* you review everyone fics, eh? 

[OrpheumZero]

Well sometimes I don't get time to read everybody's stories. But it'd be nice to get a review for at least every story  ;D

[OrpheumZero]

I just added my entry for contest XI. Lady, the spunky devil hunter from Devil May Cry takes a much needed break after hunter demons.

Also, here's a quick look at what I've got in the works for the near future:

*Chapter 3 of my and Yarr's Sakura story.

*Another Case Closed adventure featuring Rachel.

*A Dragonball Z story featuring a 'lost episode' during Gohan's training with Videl. 

[FallenStar]

*A Dragonball Z story featuring a 'lost episode' during Gohan's training with Videl. 

Sounds almost like the story I did with Gohan and Videl.  =P  But, you'd probably do poop instead of pee  xD

[OrpheumZero]

I have just posted the third part of my and Yarr's Sakura story.  Another glorious dump from our favorite sailor fuku wearing badass. Let us wish Yarr luck as he'll be handling part 4 in the near future.

[yarr]

I will have my army of a single one armed one fingered drunk monkey type it up as fast as possible.

[OrpheumZero]

Go monkeys go! Go monkeys go! Go monkeys go! Go monkeys go!

Let the toilets of Japan and the world quake in fear of Sakura's ass!  (Jumps out of the way as avalanche of Sakura's shit piles onto streets)

[OrpheumZero]

I just applied some edits to my Devil May Cry story. Hopefully this will be in better taste now for those naysayer!  (just kididng, I'm not mad..... *Rages at lack of proofreading-ness*)

[Jimmy Olsen]

To clarify my review, I think the scenery and atmosphere in the opening scene are great, but that those sort of details are largely missing from the rest.  I also don't think the toilet use itself was terribly well-described, but I can sympathize.  After writing enough stories where somebody uses the toilet it gets hard to write a dazzling new toilet scene each time.

[OrpheumZero]

Well what do you think of the improved version? I fixed the spelling errors and added some more description to the scenes/locations.

[Jimmy Olsen]

I'll read it once I finish critiquing the poem and novelette my friends wrote.

[Jimmy Olsen]

Sorry that took so long.  I didn't notice a lot of changes, but I did notice that you paint a clear picture of the diner.  I can really picture what's going on.  Did you update the pooping scene, too?

There are still a number awkwardly-worded sentences and little errors.  Probably the most annoying one is "You know, I may be a fun loving girl, but I'm that adventurous."  I assume that's meant to be "I'm *not* that adventurous."  You also say "blood gushing from the new worlds like fountains" instead of "new wounds."  Those are just the two worst examples.  You should really go through and proofread the whole story.

Still, you've got my vote.  ;D

[OrpheumZero]

Sorry that took so long.  I didn't notice a lot of changes, but I did notice that you paint a clear picture of the diner.  I can really picture what's going on.  Did you update the pooping scene, too?

There are still a number awkwardly-worded sentences and little errors.  Probably the most annoying one is "You know, I may be a fun loving girl, but I'm that adventurous."  I assume that's meant to be "I'm *not* that adventurous."  You also say "blood gushing from the new worlds like fountains" instead of "new wounds."  Those are just the two worst examples.  You should really go through and proofread the whole story.

Still, you've got my vote.  ;D

*Twitches* DIE!!!! @_o *Charges at errors and stabs them with a butter knife* EVIL! *Sets fire to errors and then eats a potato chip* Ok, I'm better now.....


~Jimmy's possible reaction:  ~

Anyway, I'll get on it and fix those mentioned mistakes, thanks for pointing them out. I hate it that I don't notice them until it's too late. One of these days I need to get a better writing program with the poofreader that fixes things for you and knows what you're trying to write (at least I think there's something like that )