After I posted that idea into another thread, it took over. Therefore, I believe this might need its own thread. Lets work together to make the Battleshits World Tournament into a good story.
Here are some ideas I had:
The tournament organizers rented an auditorium to host the tournament, and scattered flyers all over the place that sought contestants and viewers. A Website is also created, but to avoid controversy, the website says it is there to "Investigate the mysterious flyers." Contestants are referred to a secret location where they are determined if they may enter the contest. Tickets to get in cost $50, and audience attendance determined how much the winner is paid. The auditorium is full of viewers, and the stage is full of contestants. The best shits get preserved somehow so that they can be displayed at future tournaments.
If anyone wants to write one, that is fine by me. Just let others know about my idea.
Is this gonna be a crossover? As in Kasugano Sakura vs. Jill Valentine vs. Faye Valentine vs. Samus Aran vs. Winry Rockbell vs. Priss Asigiri etc. etc.?
Quote from: Jimmy Olsen on December 02, 2011, 01:52:37 AM
Is this gonna be a crossover? As in Kasugano Sakura vs. Jill Valentine vs. Faye Valentine vs. Samus Aran vs. Winry Rockbell vs. Priss Asigiri etc. etc.?
....vs. Hinata Hyuuga vs. Chun Li vs. Sakura Haruno vs. Claire Redfield vs. Bulma vs. Tsunade. vs. Princess Peach vs. Revy.....etc
Every universe shall collide!!!!
I'm curious... what exactly are the rules to Battleshits?
I mean, I've seen the scene from Harold and Kumar, but they didn't exactly go into detail about how the game was won or lost.
It seemed like the sounds were important in the movie. Would that play a role? Or would winners be determined by size, consistency, smell? A combination of all or some of those things?
I was just curious to see what everyone thought the rules of such a competition would be.
Probably the way to score it would be with a point system, split into certain categories that then combine for the final score. Obviously size and volume (amount) would be the biggest factors, but things like straining, gestation (or whatever you'd call the holding process), and perhaps how the girl "performs" (for intstance, Yuna does it all in her panties; Faye clogs up a toilet).
There is potential here. The biggest question though is how should it be done? Like a round robin perhaps? We all could post the "entrees", the preliminary portions. Then we vote here, and the winner is written competing. Rinse, wash, and repeat.
Of course, there'd have to be some limitations. Obviously Yarr's Melina couldn't appear, being a giantess with an intestinal tract the size of Rhode Island (or probably close, lol) would have it too easy. And certainly gals like Aisha and Fran might be questionable given their non-human natures and ability to easily birth montrous loads. And then there's the question of how to link these universes. Do we just pretend that they all exist and ignore their backstory worlds? Or do we have something like Sharkbait's ruin a bathroom where somehow the gals are all pulled into a central universe?
There's also a possibility for a Battlepiss (Piss Wars? So you think you can Piss a lot?) spin-off (so that stick in the mud Fallenstar could participate :P). And this one could have loads of potential too. Like Irma from W.I.T.C.H having powers over water, could dazzle people with a display of controlling her pee and making it do tricks. Same goes for Katara, being a waterbender. And then even stranger thing like Luna from the Harry Potter books downing a potion to make her pee come out in sparkling weird colors.
Oh my god...I don't care how, but this needs to happen.
Listen, I've had a shitty fall semester at school and I realize I've mostly been a noshow around these boards. But I felt the need to come out of my lair to say, this needs to happen.
Oh geez.
(Plus, that reminds me that someone really needs to write a story with Luna in it already. ...Maybe it will be me.)
Quote from: OrpheumZero on December 02, 2011, 02:51:34 PM
And then there's the question of how to link these universes. Do we just pretend that they all exist and ignore their backstory worlds? Or do we have something like Sharkbait's ruin a bathroom where somehow the gals are all pulled into a central universe?
I was wondering about this too. Maybe the contest is put on my some all powerful, inter-dimensional being offering the winner a single wish? It seems a little corny, but any character from any anime / video game is going to have *something* they want to motivate them and I doubt anyone would be reading this for the storyline anyway :).
Some sort of weird cosmic thing could be the reason. Or we just throw the girls in and ignore their canon stories (they all just happen to be themselves.... yea) or something like that.
Um...yes? Please?
:kawaii: :kawaii: :kawaii:
Quote from: OrpheumZero on December 02, 2011, 08:09:13 PM
Some sort of weird cosmic thing could be the reason. Or we just throw the girls in and ignore their canon stories (they all just happen to be themselves.... yea) or something like that.
Good.
Because there are 2 players I wanted to have from 2 different worlds:
1. Tomochan from Azumanga
2. Tina for Dead Or Alive games.
Only thing I can think of is that the cosmic entity, for whatever reason, appears in the respective world (like in the world of Final Fantasy IX) and disguises itself as a mysterious person to either draw the attention of that universe's respective girl, or call to her directly (ie: Garnet sees a flyer or something) and then they're drawn into wherever the world the Tournament takes place.
I just wanna know - did "battleshits" exist before Harold and Kumar go to White Castle, or did the film invent the concept? ??? Cuz like Poowrite, I've never been able to find any sort of rules, or for that matter figure out how the girl "won" in the movie.
I thought I'd let you guys know that I'm working on a battleshits story right now. It's slowly coming together and might be finished in about a week or two. I'm just trying to work some stuff out and plan out the stages. But I can tell you it is a character cross over, battleshits is a world renowned sport and here's the selling point, it's a tag team match between the teams of Sakura Haruno and Hinata Hyuuga from the Naruto universe and Princess Peach and Samus Aran from the Nintendo universe. I've set out my own rules based on the scene from H&K. Whether it works will depend on the final product. Feel free to add any ideas or thoughts and I'll try and push myself to finish it.
I would say this can be called the prototype. It'll set out an initial concept and execution. If it works, then we'll all jump in somehow. If not, we'll do any fine tuning and try again.
Quote from: Quagmire on December 07, 2011, 09:20:21 PM
I just wanna know - did "battleshits" exist before Harold and Kumar go to White Castle, or did the film invent the concept? ??? Cuz like Poowrite, I've never been able to find any sort of rules, or for that matter figure out how the girl "won" in the movie.
Far as I can tell it did originate from Harold and Kumar. Unless of course it was some sort of really vague and hardly known College sport like Beer Pong. Though the movie didn't really have any particular rules, it just seemed to be which girl could make the loudest, plop-iest load. For this version however, it most certainly should use a combination of load quantity, appearance, delivery (how the girl acts during the unloading), and presentation (do they poop into their pants? Or do it while performing a trick?).
I would definiately say we shouln't have too many tag teams, but it could at least be an interesting kind of "Springboard" story to then write around.
My rule was that winner is decided by the size of the dump taken.
Size would probably be the biggest determining factor, but we should also include other things.
If size is going to be so important, there should be size categories for the girls. It wouldn't be fair for small girls like Hinata to go up against big adult women.
Also, "finalists" implies there will be more than one round. I imagine it would take a while to accumulate the waste needed for a competition like this. I'm picturing contestants eating special diets, maybe even anti-diarrhea pills, and abstaining from bowel movements for several days as they prepare for their epic dumps. So are the rounds a few days apart? Weeks? And how many rounds are there?
Given how shy Hinata is, I wouldn't be surprised if she's the kind of girl who holds it back for days. Either because she's too nervous to dump outside her home or in the woods, or just has that kind of regularity.
Putting a shy girl in a contest like this should be fun. I can just picture her getting tongue-tied in a pre-match interview.
If Naruto is there rooting for her, you can bet she'll close to passing out from the crushing waves of embarrassment. :P
She could make eye contact with him, and suddenly lose her whole load against her will. Maybe that's how her performance goes.
So she craps herself twice in a story? I like it. And at least Sakura and Ino are innocent this time....
It would be cool if she loses it accidentally, but the timer had started so it counts as her performance, and the judges like it better than her competitor's carefully rehearsed dump.
Certainly an idea. She's too nervous to think of how she was gonna shit, then gets surprised by Naruto appearing to encourage her, and winds up winning because she just dropped a massive load into her sweatpants.
Yeah, and her cute accident makes for a better performance than her competitor, who has more practice and more poop.
Another neat event would be a girl who can't get it out on command. She seems too bound-up to poop. But, with moments left on the clock, she whips out a suppository, inserts it, and it takes effect before the timer buzzes.
That, or you could apply that to Hinata's sheepishness. She's trying to poop on command, but is too nervous. Then seeing Naruto in the crowd overwhelms her and she litterally "Gushes".
Quote from: OrpheumZero on December 15, 2011, 10:31:17 PM
Then seeing Naruto in the crowd overwhelms her and she litterally "Gushes".
Best pun ever! =D
Should this be the first one, or is there already an established champ? If there isn't, I've got an idea for who it could be.
It'd probably be the first. Or we'd just toss in a fake character as the "champion" and then bump her off with a new winner.
I've got an idea of a plot for this (assuming it needs one). The Egyptian gods decide to bestow divine powers upon a mortal, but there is great debate as to who. The Egyptian pantheon is now dominated by Khepri (a god of the Sun who is sometime a man and sometimes a dung beetle) and Hathor (a goddess of love and beauty who is sometimes a woman and sometimes a cow). She wants to give the power to the most beautiful woman in the multiverse, while he has a natural bias toward dung-producers. The compromise they reach is that the power will be given to a woman with an abundance of both beauty and feces.
So the gods pull all these women out of their respective universes and into the universe of the Egyptian gods, so they can compete to earn the prize of power. Khepri and Hathor (who I did not make up, by the way) are the judges. Khepri is excited by huge volumes of poop, while Hathor is looking for beauty and finesse (although she's spent enough time in bovine form to feel a certain kinship with women who drop a lot of manure).
I think the winner of something this awesome deserves a depiction when the time comes :)
I imagined that if Yarr was to draw the picture, it would be a battle between Misato and Sakura.