Man... I really loved the concept and I can't fault you for the quantity of action going on in this story. But, I did find it a bit hard to follow sometimes. Starting a new paragraph when a new speaker begins speaking would've really helped with that.
Otherwise, not too bad. Thanks for sharing!
Reviews For The Saiyan Gummy Bear Challenge
Title: How Saiyans Treat Their Toilets Reviewer: Poowrite Signed
Date: Jan 09, 2018 11:00 pm [Report This]