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Title: You Got a Phone Call! Reviewer: Adrian69702017 Signed
Good story.  
Date: Jan 03, 2017 11:45 am [Report This]
Title: You Got a Phone Call! Reviewer: secretaccount122 Signed
Okay. Definetally not my taste. Nice descriptive words thoug, and a nice concept. How lucky is that, winning a radio contest in the middle of your dump. I can't tell if that's extreamly lucky or extreamly unluchy. Both? Good job.
Date: May 12, 2012 10:46 am [Report This]
Title: You Got a Phone Call! Reviewer: pokiemun Signed
is there gonna be any more storys involving this person id like to see
Date: Aug 07, 2010 05:35 am [Report This]
Title: You Got a Phone Call! Reviewer: phil Signed
Good work, Great story it was just what i was looking for.
Date: Feb 24, 2009 02:09 am [Report This]
Title: You Got a Phone Call! Reviewer: phil Signed
Good work, Great story it was just what i was looking for.
Date: Feb 24, 2009 02:09 am [Report This]
Title: You Got a Phone Call! Reviewer: Jimmy Olsen Signed
This is an amusing little story, but not fully satisfying. There's something I don't like about the beginning, but it's hard to put it into words. The first paragraph connects the contest to cooking utensils, connects those to a love of cooking, connects that to a love of food, connects that to binging, and mentions that she binged the night before. Then the first sentence of the second paragraph tells us she's going to have diarrhea due to her binge. I find it hard to really say what's wrong with this, it just doesn't seem like a natural way to begin and develop a story.

From there it proceeds pretty predictably, with a couple enjoyable bits. I particularly like the idea of the towel as a makeshift diaper, but it doesn't figure into the story for long. The ending could have used more punch.

But keep writing. You've got some talent, and I always enjoy seeing a challenge become a real story.
Date: Feb 03, 2009 04:19 am [Report This]
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