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Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: HaloAnime Signed
Cale, a Round Robin is other users can add chapters to your story
Date: Jul 18, 2014 01:35 am [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Echo Signed
Your writing is pretty good. The character interactions are done reasonably well, the actions could use a little work but that is why we practice, no?

The biggest problem here actually is probably the easiest fixed, the wall of text really needs to be broken up into paragraphs. If your having trouble with the site formatting here's what I do. Left facing arrow < then lower case "p" then a right facing arrow > No spacing. That at the start of every paragraph should get around any format issues

Lastly, even though this is essentially a work of fan fiction you still should work on setting. Tell us who she is, where she is, why she's escaping. It'll really help with the quality of the piece.

Well, that's all for now. I wish you luck and happy writing

-Echo

Date: Jul 12, 2014 10:17 am [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Waru Signed
This is a story?
Date: Jul 09, 2014 01:29 am [Report This]
Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: HaloAnime Signed
For a practice story, this is quite good. It's a bit short, but still good. I'd be Hapoy to contribute to the Round  Robin.
Date: Jul 08, 2014 11:48 pm [Report This]
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